I SAY I SAY I SAY BOY

It's foggy out
and I'm wanting chili from wendys
before
working maybe while working...
Is it weird I think the fog is cool?

Looking forward to reminiscing in my new red notebook (half price was having a sale).

and another day, but not just another day

merry christmas three ish days early... I think the eve is my most favorite day.
this is a poem I got from a friend--- kind of a liturgy.


it is a time of whispers
of rumors and echoes
angels are unfurling their wings
stars are dancing new steps
and the universe is drawing breath
for now we live in the waiting time

let the darkness gather
let the seasons change
let the nights draw in
to their darkest moment

the light is on it's way

so come now
be a blessing to the frantic and worried world
come now
and find space
silence
stillness

for God is slipping into skin
and restless in the womb

it is advent

Everything.

Today is one of those days where stuff gets done on autopilot and there's finally a harsh chill in the air that says.. yet again.. an Indiana winter is fast approaching. There might be a little romance left in fall but I doubt it. I don't think its a secret to many people that if I were honest, I'd be anywhere but here. And by here I mean activity and location in life. I find myself thinking ahead rather than what's going on at the moment. Although the more I think about it, I'm realizing how utterly selfish that is. Yet today is my little sister's eleventh birthday. She is the kind of 'baby of the family' in the way of looking out for us older ones. As well as sometimes being more mature and grow up. But I remember when I turned eleven. Not ten, not twelve. Only remember the eleventh year for some reason. The main thing I remember was feeling very 'the weight of all my years is upon me!' oh throw thy hand across thy brow for thee is of very olden years...!
And how quickly the years pass. Right now I am on my sixth day of recovering from an eye infection. Even though I can't put anything like a contact or eyeliner pencil near them, I still am so happy because I can do life things that involve more than a darkroom ambiance. It was really difficult. I took an average of 15 naps a day and listened to t.v shows. But I am so thankful for eyesight now! And being able to look at this computer screen full on without my eyes utterly failing me.

I'm engaged!

That felt funny to even write. (j/k by the way) Everyone is getting married... I guess it happens.
And I found a new library today. 42nd and college. I'm very excited and am typing within its hallowed walls at this moment. To be able to marry books...but no. I'll hold out for flesh and blood.

Blond moment

For example, I've never really had to deal with peep holes before. But today, I was alone in the apartment and with the ensuing knock, I checked to see my visitor through this hole. Immediately ducking, I crawled carefully to the other room. Side note: if it was the boogie man, the door wasn't even locked. After a time of silence, I again crawled to noiselessly turn the bolt and deadlock the door. More knocks, and I hear.. "maintenance!" I then opened the door (with the deadlock still intact) and told him to come back another day.
Shockingly, I learned the other person cannot see you peep at them. Which I guess is the point of the peep hole. I even double checked on the outside, and couldn't see a thing. Sad I know.